By : Tika Kartika
Mentor: Oky Primadeka
The Lord created any creature with a partner, such as male and female, day and night, the heavens and the earth as well as love and hatred. Human is completed with love by the Lord for others, and marriage is a promise between a man and a woman to live together as a couple, united in one family. Every couple celebrated their happiness with various events and party. Every country has its culture and tradition in celebrating wedding day in terms of reception, dowry, guests, and various other unique tradition as in Indonesia and Turkey.
In Indonesia, many people are getting marriage after a big day of Islam, such as Idul Adha and Idul Fitri, while Turks prefer to get married in summer because fo the weather. The event can also be conducted outdoor and the guests do not need to use a thick coat, hats and boots. Unlike in Indonesia where the guests come only from the relatives, neighbors, and friends, in Turkey anyone can join the wedding events. They give allow anyone who wants to attend the event whether they are friend or not, saying that they want to share their happiness to all people come.
In Indonesia, such in Sunda, there are several series of events during the wedding procession. One among the others is what people called Seserahan, Seserahan is a gift from the groom to the bride, and it’s given in 3-7 days before the wedding. Usually, Seserahan consists of prayers, cosmetics, dresses, sandals, bags, household supplies and so on. Meanwhile, in Turkey there is similar tradition as in Sunda, popularly known as Bohcasi which means shawl or a wide. There are two kinds of Bohcasi namely Gelin Bohcasi and Damat Bohcasi. Gelin Bohcasi is a gift from the groom to the bride that usually in the form of dress, bag, watch, cosmetics, and sandals. In the past, Bohcasi was given using a shawl, but now Bohcasi can be decorated in such a way. Damat Bohcasi is a gift from the bride to the groom, and it’s an event prestige where the bride’s parents give the best for their son in-law a branded jacket, shoes, watch, a razor, parfume, pajamas, even bath towel.
On the night before the wedding day, in Sunda, there is an event called Ngeunyeuk seureuh. Ngeunyeuk seureuh means a process and it is held at the bride’s house and attended by the big family of the couples. This event is led by a woman who has been aged and well understood. This event is often called nini pangeunyeuk. In this event, the bride and the groom ask their parents blessing while listening to the advice from Nini Pangeunyeuk, which is symbolized by some objects such as parawanten, pangrainan, and so on. The event is also enlivened with traditional songs.
Furthemore, at the event they is sawer event by throwing rice for a symbol of welfare for them, and then they will be hit with a broom stick to cultivate affection and work hard. Later, nini pangeunyeuk opens the white cloth that covering pangeunyeuk. It symbolizes that the family which will be built is still clean without sins. After that, the groom split mayang jambe and pinang fruit which symbolize the kindhearted of wife and couples who love each other. The last, they lit seven candles as in Sunda cosmology, it is believed as bright seven days, and hope for honestly to foster the household.
Different from Sundanese tradition that full of advice and various rituals in the last night of the bride and groom, the last night before the wedding day in Turkey there is kina gecesi. It’s a celebration of the girl’s last night with her families. Before this event, there is kiz iteme. Here the bride and the groom ask their parents blessing. The unique thing from this event is that the groom will be served coffee with a very salty taste. It’s a tradition of Turkish to remind that marriage is not always about a pleasure, but there are also difficulties or problems that must be faced with patience. Commonly, the average of the grooms will spend the coffee as a commitment of his seriousness to run the marriage. After that, at night, it will be continued with kin gecesi event. It’s the last night for the girl, so this event is made with typical festive dance of Turkey as halay danc. All invited guests are women from both sides and neighbors. They gather in the wedding room or in a place close to the bride’s house. This event is used as a showcase for the bride by using the most beautiful dress and makeup. Moreover, they can show their hair because it’s only attended by woman.
Every tradition has things that contain myths, especially about mate. It can’t be denied, and it’s believed even all over the world. In Indonesia, in the marriage custom of Sundanese which one of a series of the event is show of spray (siraman), and the society believes that whoever rubbed his face with a former water of siraman, so he will be closer with his soulmate, in other words he will get marriage soon. Whereas in Turkey, at wedding procession, the girls will write their names on the shoes used by the bride to dance all the time. They believe whose named was disappeared from the shoes will get marriage soon. Actually it’s hard to be believed. However, this is the myth that although not completely true but many people still believe and do it.
Getting married doesn’t mean just staying together and sharing. Marriage is the beginning of a great journey in life because it requires us to accept all the shortcomings and advantages of our partner, and be able to complete each other. In Indonesia especially in Sundanese tribe that has a series of events. Each has meaning and advice, starting with the application, fiancé, ngenyeuk seureuh, making lungkun, saweran, until the wedding reception. Similarly in Turkey, there are several engagement events: bohcasi, kiz iteme, kina gecesi, and the wedding reception itseld. Meanwhile, the way to celebrate happy day, all the series of each country has the same purpose and intention that is expecting a harmonious and happy familly.